ive thot i have

ive thot i have

ive thot i have a way to gauge how 
happy i am is by how often i wake with a smile. 
today i woke with a smile. my body smiled, and relaxed. 
it was filled but light and easy. smile for me when you wake 
tomorrow, let the smile fill you for you have devastated me with 
your sex and your beauty.

as if from miles away with 
the longest reach you have wasted 
me with innocent tenderness and dark throbbing 
sadness--which finally equals love because love is the 
absence of fear, 

it is the awareness and ever-increasing reverence for 
the power held by combined throngs of nature, 
and all of the birds in the world have 
flown for you, since the day you were born, and all of the 
waves lap against sand like so many flags hung to 
symbolise the fight do, in winds of ten hundred countries.

ive thot i have we are what we make of each others army. 
ive thot we are cattle lowing in each others midst. ive thot 
i have that sun belongs inside of us. sun belongs in the red 
and black caves we echo each other in.

sun belongs in the orifices, the clockwork veins and streams 
of consciousness. without that image of you, the sun, 
dark mutes the senses and living is senseless. 
without you, moon, time turns 
meaningless. as long as i do 
not remember to look 
and look up 
i fail to be 
celestial.